


Black Fingernails, Red Wine

by sian1359



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Crossover, F/M, Gen, M/M, Mission Fic, Not Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Compliant, Not Captain America: The Winter Soldier Compliant, Not Iron Man 3 Compliant, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-21
Updated: 2014-08-21
Packaged: 2018-02-14 01:58:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2173758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sian1359/pseuds/sian1359
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens after Captain America gets turned into a vampire.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Black Fingernails, Red Wine

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Akabit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akabit/gifts).



> Title is from a song of the same name by Eskimo Joe.
> 
> I wrote this indirect response to one of my recipient's requests, and then realized I wanted to tell the story of what happened leading up to the meeting also, only I didn't get it done before the reveal, and ended up corrupting my initial story when I stripped out the preface. My apologies to my recipient and the mods of the crossovering exchange for having to put a placeholder statement in the body of the story for the reveal while I had my beta send me a clean copy of the story tonight.
> 
> The additional story, Black Fingernails, Red Wine: What Came First should be up within the next two weeks.

_My apologies_ , JARVIS' disembodied voice suddenly sounded throughout the plane.

Phil paused in his conversation with Summers and offered her his own expression of apology for the interruption, to which she just offered a smile of acceptance and settled back in her seat. The just as engrossed conversation between Steve, Harris and Rosenberg also paused, with Steve turning and looking Phil's direction with a gesture for him to take the lead.

Phil held in his sigh. "Yes, JARVIS?" he asked in his most neutral tone, even as he decided to get Natasha's assistance in coming up with an appropriate payback for Steve making him the one who had to deal with Tony this soon. She still had her own axe to grind over Steve's recent bout of recalcitrance and bullheadedness and, while Phil prided himself on his ability to think out of the box in many ways, he was a rank amateur in comparison to types of ideas the Black Widow came up with when it came to revenge.

_Up until this point, I have maintained your operation security, but Sir ordered me to inform him when you once again crossed into American air space. He will be airborne inside an Iron Man suit and inbound within the next few minutes. As he chose the Mark Nineteen, which it the model with the top speed rating, I do not believe he will be content with waiting until you land at Teterboro._

"Iron Man is flying out to meet us?" Harris repeated. "Wait, so you guys really are all friends? You don't just fight super-villains together? Is there any way we can watch his approach?"

"Xander –" Rosenberg admonished her companion, which had Steve saying it was okay, before he then started explaining the current Avenger dynamic.

"Don't suppose you want to come up here and deal with him, boss?" Clint called back to Phil from the cockpit as Natasha, the coward, simply got up and gestured to Phil and then the seat from where she and Clint had been trading off piloting duties over the last eight hours as they'd flown back from Normandy to New York.

Phil gave Clint the glare he still couldn't find himself to give to Captain America, but dutifully got up." "If you don't mind," he apologized once more to Summers cutting short their review of the misinformation SHIELD had received from and about the Demon Research Initiative when it had been defunded and dissolved.

"Natasha, wasn't Samantha Finn in one of your training classes, during one of your rotations at the Hub?" he asked her as they moved toward one another. "Perhaps you could show Miss Summers some of their lower level mission files so she can see how the Finns are doing now?"

"Call me Buffy, please. Isn't it a rule that once you fight demons together and someone almost dies, everyone's on first names?"

"Indeed it is," Clint chimed in agreement. "Anyone who exchanges bodily fluids should be on a first name basis –"

"Clint," Phil spoke in soft warning, not that anyone seemed offended or, perhaps, had really even heard Clint, since Harris was saying at the same time, with a certain, recognizable whine:

"Yeah, Mr. Harris is my father's name. I'm not old enough to be Mr. Harris."

"You're thirty-two, Xander. Considering you're the same age we are and Buffy's baby sister is now married and having her own baby, I think you're old enough for someone to assume you're a responsible adult," Rosenberg – Willow chided Xander once more. "You're embarrassing us in front of half of the Avengers – "

Phil smiled, not just at Buffy but also at the mild bickering that continued in the background as Willow and Xander reminding him quite a bit of Pepper and Tony. "Thank you for the privilege, Buffy. And I'm good with being called Phil, despite what a few others might imply –"

" _You know, Agent_ ," Tony's voice overrode the jet's comm system as if on cue. " _When I agreed to let you guys borrow a plane for a quick trip to Seattle, you didn't say it was a mission, that it would be by way of France, and take forty-two hours, forty-one and a half which were privacy restricted. Not that France is a bad place to go if you're looking to indulge in a little ménage à trois, but you didn't need to leave the Tower for that. It's not like we judge_ –"

"Tony, we have ladies present – guests – " Steve interrupted, looking more embarrassed than Phil thought he did himself, (despite knowing his ears were flushing – and that Clint now sported a big grin and was no doubt itching to say a few words himself although he at least held onto them while Steve did the berating).

Tony Stark, in one of his flashier Iron Man armors, was maintaining what looked like a hover in front of the cockpit's windshield, making the backwards flying and maneuvering he needed to do to maintain his current appearance pretty impressive, as Clint was being an asshole and jinking the plane just enough to keep Tony on his toes, but the FAA and the Port Authority off of Clint's ass as he continued to pilot them toward the Teterboro Airport.

" _Guests?_ Lady _guests? And Steve? What in the hell_ happened _in France? Wait, is one of the guests Aunt Peggy? I thought she was in a pretty advanced stage of –_

_Shit. Sorry. I only know you've been gone for forty-two hours because that's how long JARVIS said I was locked in the lab working on a surprise for Brucie and while flying is bracing, maybe I should have had a little more coffee first._ "

"No, Tony, Peggy isn't with us and, yes, she isn't going to get any better to be able to visit," Steve said soberly now, his embarrassment replaced with sorrow that he was losing his last close tie to his past, as Peggy Carter had been moved into an elderly care center.

Phil wasn't sure if Steve knew the Center was a SHIELD facility, didn't supposed he actually cared all that much, beyond having been able to see firsthand that the Center was not one of those places that made the evening news from their apathetic or worse care for their patients.

" _I'm sorry, Steve. I should probably go visit myself, before it's too late_."

"It doesn't have to be today, Tony. You need to land before you kill yourself or make JARVIS take over the controls because you fell asleep."

" _I'm not_ – "

"Yes, you are."

"Face plant or not, Tony, I'm done playing chicken with you," Clint spoke up. "Which means for the rest of you, it's time to raise your seat tables, buckle in and prepare for landing, as we are home."

"For certain assumptions of home that include New Jersey," Phil murmured with a quick smile and a brush of his hand across Clint's shoulders as he took Natasha's abandoned co-pilot seat. His smile widened at the sound of Tony's squawk about how he'd never fallen or fallen asleep in the suit, both of which were blatant lies, and he allowed himself a mild, silent chuckles when he heard Buffy ask of Natasha behind him:

"Is it always like this?"

*******

"Tony, not right now," Steve said preemptively upon the elevator door opening up and seeing Tony (along with Bruce and Pepper) standing there confrontationally in front of them.

"No! You do not get to say 'not right now'," Tony exploded right back. "JARVIS is claiming you got turned into a fucking vampire. A vampire! And the rest of you went haring off to rescue him without asking for Bruce and my help. Without even telling us what was going on. That is not cool man."

Pepper reached out to calm Tony down and Phil winced when Tony purposely stepped away in a refusal to be mollified. Not that Phil was surprised; Tony was obviously in the manic phase of his exhaustion, not to mention phenomenally angry and hurt.

"Do not tell me to calm down," he actually snapped at Pepper. "Bruce and I have every right to be agitated right now. We're supposed to be a team – "

Of course, even as he said that, his eyes widened and Tony spun around so he could look at Bruce, while Steve, from where he was standing next to Phil, started to fidget a little himself, undoubtedly in embarrassment both from being berated in front of guests as well as because, to a great extent, Tony wasn't wrong in his outrage.

"But you're not too agitated, right?" Tony was asking Bruce. "The Other Guy isn't going to make a surprise visit and put his own two billion cents in?"

"I'd feel better if you at least let them out of the elevator," Bruce suggested. He looked pissed off certainly, but not so angry that any green had started showing. He also moved back from the elevator, which drew Tony and Pepper both away enough that Natasha could lead everyone out.

She nodded her thanks at Bruce while she shepherded the Slayer and her friends toward the conversation pit in the recessed center of the floor. Clint peeled off to grab some water bottles from the bar; he went ahead and also set aside his bow and quiver case, which was either a concession to their company, or the heightened tempers in the room, as when he couldn't properly care and store his weapons after a mission, he'd at least start inspected them while he was tied up with whatever kept him from his preferred routine – especially if there were junior SHIELD agents present.

"Fine. We've all stepped back and are ready to have a civilized discussion," Tony granted, voice heavy with sarcasm, when everyone took a seat. "Why did you exclude Bruce and me? And who in the hell are these people you did invite? Off-the-book SHIELD agents? _Vampire consultants_?"

"Actually, we are. Well, not vampires who are consultants, but consultants who are experts on vampires," Willow started to explain before Tony's snort of derision had her falling silent and Buffy turning a glare in his direction. Xander, Phil noted, seemed more amused than offended or anything else. Much like Clint's and Natasha's although you really had to know them to know they were laughing at Tony's outrage.

"Yeah, and how does one become an expert on vampires. Watching the Twilight movies twenty times or more?"

Before Tony could mock them any further, Buffy had drawn a stake from somewhere on her body that Phil hadn't been able to detect, and had moved from her seat across from Tony to just before him, the stake poised just against his arc reactor, faster than even Natasha could have stopped her, not that she'd made any move to do so.

"By being chosen as the Slayer," Buffy answered him, her voice a low growl. "By being given power I never asked for and never wanted, which made me and any of my friends targets by every vamp and demon because they could smell it on me."

" _Into every generation a slayer is born: one girl in all the world, a chosen one. She alone will wield the strength and skill to fight the vampires, demons, and the forces of darkness; to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their number. She is the Slayer,"_ Willow intoned the instant Buffy stepped back, her hair rising into a nimbus around her face while the air around them crackled and grew heavy much like it had when Thor had drawn on his power, a different demonstration of her magics than she'd used against the Mohra demon.

"And what do you do?" Bruce asked of Xander, after Buffy had backed off and returned to her seat, while Willow let her power drain away. He had a hint of green about him in response to the threat, but also a smile, as if he'd enjoyed seeing Tony rendered speechless just as much as Phil had.

Xander hadn't moved from where he was lounging back on the couch, rolling the bottle of water in his hands and looking almost bored while everyone else had shifted closer to the edge of violence. "Pretty much just sit back and watch the ladies kick ass." He gave them a salute with his water, then rolled his head toward a still quiet Tony.

"Be thankful your friends didn't call you in on this one, Stark," he continued. "Seeing _Captain America_ with fangs is a nightmare that's going to take a little time to shake, but it never goes away when it’s a friend who gets turned – especially when you're the one who has to stake him."

"Maybe we could have killed the Mohra demon whose blood we needed blood for the cure a little quicker had you been along," Buffy acknowledge when Xander fell silent. "But we just as easily could have had the whole thing turn to shit because, be honest, would you have believe Captain Rogers had become a vampire? Do you even really believe it now?"

Tony scowled, but no longer from the anger he'd been holding. "I can't say I want to believe in vampires, since we already have enough to worry about with aliens and evil overlord wannabees, but after giant, flame-breathing hamsters, who am I to say what can and can't exist?" he conceded. "And I guess repulsar rays aren't a substitute for wooden stakes or magic, in this case."

"Tasers slow vampires down," Natasha offered. "And since we knew what we were going up against, Clint stocked wooden shafts."

"Fine, you were right, I would have been ineffective and the Hulk would have been just as likely to kill Steve if he saw the fangs. I apologize. You knew what you were doing and if you had told me first, I wouldn't have let you leave us behind."

"Savor the day. Some of us got to see Captain America decapitate demons and vampires with his shield, and Tony Stark apologized. I, for one, am for bed," Clint announced, levering himself up from the couch and offering first Natasha his hand, then Phil, to assist them in rising. "It's been a long thirty hours and as decadent as your jets are, not to mention a dream to pilot, Tony, they're still a bitch to sleep in."

"Pepper, Tony, can we please impose on your hospitality tonight?" Phil asked, too tired now that the tension was draining along with the adrenaline they'd been living on for the past two days, to be embarrassed by Clint's blatant display. "We'll be doing formal debriefs down at the Triskelion tomorrow, so I'll book a hotel in DC for tomorrow, but I'm not sure any of us are up for more travel without a good night's sleep? "

"Of course, Phil," Pepper was the one who answered for them. "And we apologize for ambushing you and keeping you this long, but I am sure you can understand our worries and fear once we found out what had happened. Thank you, all of you, for indulging our questions. Steve, please, you're staying overnight too?"

He nodded. "I owe you three apologies too. I thought I was protecting you by not asking for help, but I can see how it could have come across as a lack of trust."

"Just answer me one more question," from Tony, although he was looking at Xander now instead of Steve.

"Has Nick Fury met you yet?"

– Finis –

 


End file.
